Home

Well, I’m back in America.

Its weird.

Since I’ve been back I have tried to write two blog posts before this one, I lost both of them, and only wrote half of each.

The first was about the idea of “home” and reflecting on the different homes I have acquired over the past years: Grand Haven, MI where I was born and raised, Allendale, MI where I attended elementary school and church, Mt. Pleasant, MI home of my alma mater CMU the families and relationships created there, roads across America with my Bike & Build CUS family, and now Cape Town, South Africa is added to my list of homes, with my service learning teammates my family. I began thinking about these “homes” as I sat in the Amsterdam airport. Amsterdam, Netherlands being the deepest, oldest root to an idea of “home” that I have, both sides of my family being Dutch. Naturally, Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros song comes to mind, “Home is wherever I’m with you” I like having people all over, and homes all over. I love people and I love being home. The post I wrote about this before was a lot more insightful, but ach well. All I really wanted to say is that I have many homes and families and I love them all.

The second post was about the rest of my time in Cape Town, South Africa. The last week filled with braai’s, wine tasting, paper writing, presentation giving, food eating, and the last days with our children at the Brooklyn Chest hospital. The only thing really worth elaborating upon was our last day at the TB hospital, which I’ll tell you about now now:

We had a party! Jessica and I stayed up late the night before baking, writing cards and letters, sorting our gifts we had bought everyone, and dreading the moment we have to say goodbye. Once we arrive at the hospital, we are told to go to the hospital school immediately for a surprise they had arranged for us. After we walked into the school and the children smother us with hugs, we are led to two chairs in the middle of the class room. The “special music” people were there to lead them in the three songs the kids sang to us. So Jessica and I sat in the chairs, held hands, and listened to the children sing. Next the teacher sends two of the girls to a closet and they return with two beautiful bouquets of flowers! They each hug both of us, look us in the eyes and say, “Thank you so much, for everything” and they sit back down. Then two more children stand, walk to the closet, and return with cards and they do the same thing, hugging, thanking. Finally we are both given gift bags filled with dried fruits and nuts, chocolates, lotions and more. Every time a child hugged me and said, “thank you so much, for everything” I about lost it. I’d like to think I’m a pretty strong person emotionally, but these children have a tight hold on my heart. Both Jessica and I are fighting back tears throughout the whole process. We take a few minutes to ourselves before setting our part of the party up for them. Tasty desserts, a music video of them dancing and the projects we have worked on, and the big unveiling of the presents (sports equipment, games, art supplies etc). We covered the bin of toys with a table cloth and on the count of three pulled it off and watched the jaws drop. It was great. We thanked all the staff we worked with, and gave our personal goodbyes to the children-encouraging them to fight for more than just survival in the harrowing world they life in, that they can be whatever they want to be.

[Side story: one day I was sitting outside the ward with a group of children, just talking, teaching them a little sign language for fun, discussing the future. One of the older boys (about 15) was asking me about my education, and what degree I received. Then he asked what kind of degree someone needs to become president. We went around the circle talking about hopes and dreams, two of my very favorite girls both reply, “Doctor” and another boy wants to be in the army, one more wants to be a police man. They all have big dreams, and while I know that many of their dreams are realistically unattainable-I still encourage them. If they shoot for the moon hopefully they will land among the stars? They are passionate, excited and hopeful youth-who will able to do a lot of good with their life if they stay strong. They have stolen my heart.]

Return to our last day. After the big unveiling and the thanking, we play and eat the goodies for a while, and then the time comes. I do surprisingly well because I got my crying done with earlier in the day when the children gave us their gifts. One of the littlest girls has been attached to me the entire day, she knows this is goodbye. Periodically throughout the day she would pull me down to her level and tell me, “I love you so much. I will miss you so much” and doesn’t let go.

The time has come. Tears pour down her face when I kiss her cheek goodbye wipe her tears with my scarf, telling her I love her and will miss her too. Many of the kids are crying as we hug and kiss each one goodbye, thanking each other for everything we have gained and learned from each other. I know I am forever changed because of these kids, and can only hope that I have brought a small bit of light to their world as well.

As part of my capstone I left behind a volunteer job description guide, so that future volunteers can hit the ground running with the programs Jessica and I were in charge of, and continue to provide the physical, mental and emotional stimulation that is desperately needed for children in hospitals away from home for months and months on end, and children in general for that matter. And give them love. That is always the biggest thing isn’t it? Love.

There were many more goodbyes. Packing. Lots of “lasts” I kept asking myself why I keep putting myself through this? Having amazing experiences with amazing people, and then leaving them, likely to not see them again. Confusing myself with my sense of “home” But I conclude that its ABSOLUTLY worth it. Worth the Bike & Build blues and the South African sadness. For everything I learned about myself and this world.
It was a long trip back home to Grand Haven, during which I did nothing productive but maybe sort out some of my thoughts. Maybe. It was 11 hours Cape Town to Amsterdam, a 6 hour layover in Amsterdam, and a 7 hour flight to Detroit, then a 3 hour drive back home.

I’m still adjusting to being back in West Michigan, as it is quite different than Cape Town in many many aspects. I’m keeping busy, providing daycare for my wonderful neighbors and little brother, biking, reading, being disgusted at myself for my cushy life, dreaming about both Bike & Build and South Africa etc etc.

I must say, however, it is nice to be back with my family (biological one) for an extended period of time. All of us together. I love my family. I miss my friends who are biking across America on Bike & Build SUS, I miss my friends in Mt. Pleasant and all of the US and world doing good things for humanity. But I’m more proud of them than missing them-so its fine. Luckily I have some pretty great friends still in Grand Haven, MI as well.

One more post for this blog should be written shortly about things I’ve learned, how I’ve grown, what comes next and just some general thoughts. I apologize for the length of this post and the fact that it took three weeks for me to finally write!

Thank you for following my journey!

Its coming

The end.

Its coming.

Earlier this week I was asked by a close friend of mine here, Thabisile, "So, are you ready?".... "Ready for what?" I ask, and she elaborates by saying "You know..." gesturing a downward plunge with her hand, a dive, a crash. Critical low if you will. I'm refusing to think about this, avoidance is key as my friends Kelly, Summer and I know :)

I have one and a half weeks left here. The time has flown.

Today Jessica and I took our children from the TB Hospital to the Aquarium at the waterfront! It was a day filled with JOY JOY JOY. The children absolutely loved it, and their enthusiasm was catching. None of them had ever been their before, and probably would never have gone without us taking them. Watching their jaws drop when we walked into the penguin exhibit, listening to their gasps and "ooohh!!!"s and "joh!"s were priceless. Just being able to leave the hospital, go somewhere fun and cool (and educational) and act like a normal child for once was really great for our children.

Today and tomorrow are our capstone presentations on the service work we have been doing all semester, Friday a research proposal is due, and next week our big capstone report, final day of service and goodbye party at Brooklyn Chest Hospital, shopping for gifts, final service learning dinner.

Last week was filled with papers and projects and Bike & Build stalking. And bundling up in layers, scarves, sitting by the little tiny wall heater with a cup of tea. I literally just warmed my hands up over the stove-no central heating for this old house! It is certainly winter here!!!

I'm looking forward to the warm weather back home. And seeing friends and family. Being back in Grand Haven for a summer! I cannot wait, but am also very sad about leaving Cape Town, it will be very bitter sweet.

Nothing much else exciting to report, just lots and lots of homework being done, and spending as much time together as we can before it ends. I probably wont blog again until I'm home due to the whirlwind of activity from this point to the end.

And now I must go to bed. Or work on a paper. For tomorrow I am waking up early to make breakfast for some lovely individuals, then bike back to the bike shop to sell my bike back and buy supplies to fix some bikes. I found four broken bikes in a back room at Brooklyn Chest Hospital, just with minor problems (flat tires, rusty chains, skewed break pads/cables, etc etc)-all of which I can fix! The kids were so surprised when I told them I could fix bikes-I'm a girl! what could I know about fixing bikes?! Little do they know how much I learned a year ago. I cannot wait to spend next Monday cleaning and fixing bikes :D :D

I love you all and cannot wait to see you when I return home.

peace and love kristen

Bike & Build

Hmmmm, now why in the world would I be talking about Bike & Build…I’m in Cape Town, South Africa for goodness sakes!!! Well, you see, Bike&Build has been on my mind a bit lately. 1. Two of my best friends Summer and Kelly have just begun their B&B SUS’11 trip led by my dear friend Will, accompanied by many other friends of CUS’10. Which leads me to…2. Today is the one year anniversary for the start of my Bike & Build trip Central United States last year. The most life changing, amazing, incredible, fulfilling and joy-filled ten weeks of my life.

So naturally instead of the 3 papers, 2 presentations and 1 exam I should be working on, I’ve been looking at old B&B pictures, watching videos of CUS’10 running into the Pacific Ocean, chatting with my B&B family etc etc.

Also, today I finally realized what my mom, Summer, Kelly, Aunt Dianne and anyone else who avidly stalked my trip last year, went through! WOW, this takes a lot of time! I’ve just spend the last 3 hours reading rider bios and blogs, and they are only at their orientation! I am so very thankful they are on the same trip, otherwise I wouldn’t have any time to sleep!! They joy I’m experiencing, just knowing that my two closest friends from CMU are about to have the most impactful and astounding summer of their lives, is overwhelming.
What is also overwhelming is the jealousy and B&B blues I’m experiencing. In all my time here in Cape Town, I’ve experienced zero homesickness, or friendsickness or wished I were anywhere else until now. With my whole being I wish I could be there in Jacksonville, FL to send Kelly and Summer off on their journey as they sent me, one year ago. I wish I could bike with them and build with them and experience the Southern states of America with them; but I CAN send them encouragement and support and love. I absolutely cannot wait to share this experience with them via bnb stalking (I’m attempting to be even better at it than Kelly-wish me luck!) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I’M SO EXCITED FOR THEM I CAN’T CONTAIN IT!!!!! Please follow their journey too their blogs are: Kelly and Summer

*sigh* ah Bike & Build.

OK! You probably want to hear about Cape Town also, hey? It’s still wonderful. It doesn’t stop being wonderful. I’m getting more and more attached to my children at the TB hospital, and seeing more and more things that I want to do! But alas, I have only three weeks remaining!

We have lots and lots of work to do for our classes, as mentioned above. But I’m not really stressing too much, I know everything will get done, and quite honestly, my volunteering is more important. And experiencing as much as possible before I have to leave this beautiful country. I only have three weeks left and intend to live them to the fullest!!

Recent fun things: We had a reflection weekend were our service learning program went to a game reserve on the west coast. Together we reflecting on the semester’s experiences, what we have learned and bonded even more as a group. It was incredibly beautiful. The sunsets, the stars, the animals, the people, the music, the dancing, the conversations. Everything. On our game drive we saw giraffes!! I love giraffes. And springbok are everywhere. Did you know the springbok is UCT’s mascot??

The following weekend I met up with the Tour d’ Afrique, a group of cyclists who have biked here to Cape Town, South Africa, from Cairo, Egypt!!! Megan O’Brien, a Bike & Builder, was on the trip so I of course met up with her to bike the last 35K of their journey down Africa. It was cool, seeing the riders from all over the world, and also all the Capetonians who came out to bike with them as well. SO many cyclists. The finish line was at Cape Town Stadium (Green Point Stadium-World Cup), and from there they had a ceremony and speeches. I hung out with Megan’s parents and later we went to the VIP tent, but were too late for the food. At night I joined them all and the TdA riders for their Celebration dinner at a hotel on the V&A Waterfront. Later at night I rejoined some of my service learning family downtown on Long St.

This feels like home. I have a routine, I know how to get around, go grocery shopping, have my favorite hangout places, people. I’m comfortable here and could definitely picture myself here for a longer period of time 

Another spring/fall/winter break?!?

The different seasons and holidays and temperatures confuse me...

So because of Easter, and Freedom day, and another public holiday I don’t remember the name of, the result was that we had another full week off of class and volunteering. These holidays also meant that our kids at the TB hospital were able to go home for six days!! They were SOOO excited, bouncing off the walls! We had a celebration the day before we all left with bubbles, jump rope, games, and chocolate eggs. Two of our kids were even discharged for good! I am both excited and worried for them: it will be good for them to be back with their family, but they will likely not receive nutritious meals regularly like they do at the hospital, or the quality of education offered there, or the safety of the hospital either. I will never know where these children will end up in life, but can only be satisfied with the fact that I shared love with them and taught them something.

For Good Friday Edna and Trevor Rich (friends of Phil and Nancy Pleune from my home church in America) picked me up and took me to their church in Brooklyn, which ended up being literally 2 blocks away from Brooklyn Chest Hospital where I volunteer every day! The service was wonderful, in a quaint little Nazarene church. Then I spent the remainder of the day with the Rich family in their home. I ate the tradition Good Friday pickled fish with hot cross buns, enjoyed tea and cake and good conversation. The best part of the day was being with a real family again. My service learning family is wonderful and loving, don’t get me wrong, but it was so lovely being in a home with a mom, dad, little brothers and sisters, a dog, aunt, uncle, cousins, babies, and so much LOVE. They all welcomed me with open arms and I am so very thankful to Phil and Nancy for connecting me with them!! I sincerely hope I can get together with the Rich family at least a couple times more before my time here is done. They even invited me over to stay for the weekend sometime.

On Easter I left the house at 5:15am for a sunrise service up Silvermine (a mountain that overlooks the city and the ocean). It was COLD, and cloudy-but such a beautiful service. Even though we didn’t see the sun come up, once it did it started poking holes in the clouds and beaming through. I came back and slept a little while before heading out to brunch with Kathryn (Laura Frings big sis) and some of her friends. They are all in or completed the Transformative Justice Masters program at UCT, all three are Americans who want to work at NGO’s in Africa somewhere…hmmmm….they were very inspiring to talk to and meet. The rest of Easter was lazy and rainy and cozy and nice. This was probably the start of watching movies on the projector every night for the rest of the week.

Monday was another early morning because Megan, some other friends and I had to meet downtown CapeTown early in the morning to meet our guide for the Bike ‘n Wine tour at 7am. We took the train from there to Stellenbosch (about one hour) and then picked out our bikes. We only went a total of about 20k, but went tasting to a brandy distillery, and three wineries/wine farms/ vineyards. Not to worry, it was all on back trails and paths through vineyards, not on the roads. South Africa has such beautiful landscape and mountains and vineyards and wine and people. I fear I’m getting spoiled with all these nice things.

Tuesday I went shopping for warm clothes with Dania to Claremont-about 15 minutes away by Jammie Shuttle. I must speak for a moment about these Jammies. They are big blue busses for UCT students which will take you pretty much ANYWHERE you need for free. This is something we only just figured out recently unfortunately, we thought the Jammie only took students up and down campus (which is a big job in itself because Upper Campus is practically partway up Table Mountain)! But Dania and I took it to the mall in Clarmont in the morning, it can also take you downtown Cape Town, and then later in the afternoon Megan and I took the Jammie just across the street from the Mount Nelson Hotel. Nate, Karina, Elora, Stephanee, Dania, Mariel, Megan and I had High Tea there from 2:30 to 5. We felt like royalty, it was SO beautiful, so many little delicious finger food and desserts and teas. I would go up, get a plate, sit down and eat it with one kind of tea, stand up, walk around the rose gardens, return, get a new tea, a new plate of food, eat, sip tea and talk, explore the hotel, walk along the pool, and eat more desserts and drink tea and talk more. It was a lovely afternoon.

The rest of the week was spent relaxing with friends, working on three big papers we have due soon and research for those, journaling, reading, writing letters and blog posts, watching movies and tv shows on our big projector and drinking tea. It’s getting COLD here!! I was told that winter would come, but didn’t really believe it until now I guess. Houses don’t have central heat here, so you just wear lots of warm clothes and sit with a blanket around you. There is a small space heater per each room, so that’s a little helpful at least.

And now I have finally caught everyone up with my life!! WHEW!!! Three blogs posts in one week! I guess this is what happens when I procrastinate from writing blogs until I need to procrastinate from writing papers, maybe I’ll go grocery shopping at Pick ‘n Pay before doing any real work…

peace and love!!
kristen

Invasion

Each and every weekend holds something exciting.

The weekend following the homestay, I went on a weekend retreat with Jubilee, my church here. It was very much like a His House fall retreat, except for the fact that I could watch the sunrise over the ocean from my bunk bed, and more of the mountains we were halfway up on, behind us. It was located in Simons Town (where the pengins live on the beach and boulders) at a retreat center called Rocklands. Absolutely beautiful. Lots of worship, singing, prayer, messages, spending time with my lifegroup and Megan who also came. Saturday it was so very windy and cold we didn’t spend much time outside.

It was very very nice, but on this church retreat I experienced more fear than I have in all my time here in Cape Town-and no, not from a fire and brimstone sermon. Megan and I were sitting by the window, watching the waves on the ocean and the wind blowing the trees, eating granola and carrots I think; just chatting and enjoying each other’s company. Suddenly the other students in the lounge area with us, connected to the dining hall and kitchen, start running and screaming. You would think zombies were attacking or something. My initial reaction was “a bird must have flown in the dining hall” because back in America, this too would result in screaming and running. Megan and I of course got up to investigate the ruckus and found not a bird, not zombies, but a BABOON!!! Now I knew there were baboons in this area, because there are warning signs on the roads and I had seen more signs further in town and past when I biked past them during the Cape Argus ride. But nothing prepared me for this massive, monstrous beast with giant fangs leaping on the dining hall table, knocking things over in his search for food and human blood. Well, probably not human blood-but you wouldn’t know that by the angry, hungry look in his eyes. As he started running toward us we all scattered and the camp host closed off the sectional divider between the dining hall and lounge. Several of us huddled by the crack to watch the baboon control crew (I’ll call them bcc) attempt to remove the beast, especially because he had found his way into the kitchen where the cooks were preparing supper for us and we were mildly concerned about our food for the evening. The bcc successfully lured the baboon out of the building and we all breathed a sigh of relief and ventured back into the dining hall to make some tea to calm the nerves. My heart rate slowly returned to normal. I found it ironic how my first experience with real fear in Cape Town was at a church camp, not downtown at night, or in the townships, or on the train: all places that are supposedly dangerous. South Africa doesn’t have the best safety statistics after all….

The cherry on top was the next morning, as we watched some of the bcc work their way up the mountain. We were told to make sure our doors were locked, because a mob of baboons was making its way down the mountain. The baboons are invading!!! This was the atmosphere of the morning. Thankfully no baboons made it into our cabins, and only one went through the hall-not even into the dining hall again because we all made a mad dash to slam shut all the doors. Baboons are NOT cute, as some may think. On a level of scariness, a baboon is equitable to a dog chasing you and snapping its teeth while biking.

All in all, it was an exciting weekend, filled with good fellowship, experiences, learning, and nature.

Vuk'uzenzele

Literally means “wake up and do it yourself” in xhosa.

The weekend after spring break everyone on our service learning program participated in a township homestay, either in Philippi or Langa. Before we were placed in a home, all of us attended a program together with the families. This was started with a prayer, then a xhosa hymn and the South African National Anthem. Instruments aren’t really needed here, just a drum to keep the beat and the powerful harmonic voices of the xhosa families singing together. I absolutely adore the SA national anthem. Did you know that it includes the five most widely spoken of the eleven national languages of South Africa? Xhosa, Zulu, Sesotho, Afrikaans, and English. Here are the lyrics and translations, but you should also youtube it so you can listen for yourself:

Language	Lyrics	English translation
Xhosa	Nkosi sikelel' iAfrika Maluphakanyisw' uphondo lwayo,	God bless Africa Raise high its glory
Zulu	Yizwa imithandazo yethu, Nkosi sikelela, thina lusapho lwayo.	Hear our prayers God bless us, her children
Sotho	Morena boloka setjhaba sa heso, O fedise dintwa le matshwenyeho, O se boloke, O se boloke setjhaba sa heso, Setjhaba sa, South Afrika — South Afrika.	God, we ask You to protect our nation Intervene and end all conflicts Protect us, protect our nation, our nation, South Africa — South Africa.
Afrikaans	Uit die blou van onse hemel, Uit die diepte van ons see, Oor ons ewige gebergtes, Waar die kranse antwoord gee,	From the blue of our heaven, From the depth of our sea, Over our everlasting mountains, Where the crags resound,
English	Sounds the call to come together, And united we shall stand, Let us live and strive for freedom In South Africa our land.	–

So very powerful every time i hear it sung. After the singing was finished, we had the pleasure of watching some traditional African dance performance! Luckily i was sitting in the front row and took a decent video of it. I tried to upload it here but the internet couldn't handle it-but it's better in person anyways, so just come to Africa :)

Then, after the dancing, we were given a short history of these two townships. Langa is Cape Towns oldest black township dating back pre-apartheid and the name means "sun". Philippi is a newer township that was started mainly by women (single mothers) who wanted homes of their own and not just the add on shacks they were living in in Gugulethu, so they saved very little at a time, R0.50 cents (which is like 7 cents US) and they did it! Philippi is where I was placed , in a family with a mama, tata (dad) and three younger siblings: two ubuti's (brothers) and one sisi. Their house was small but nice, they had running water and a tv. Emily and Honora were with me as well, and the three of us were given the "master bedroom" to share for the weekend. It made me feel a bit guilty, because the rest of the family slept in the one other bedroom one one bed and one couch-but the hospitality here is astounding. Very similar to the food. South Africans may be the friendliest, nicest people in the world.

My favorite part about this weekend was the sense of community we were welcomed in to. Walking over to the neighbors, playing with the kids in the streets, sharing food, laughs, dancing and singing. The feeling of LOVE was so very strong. Maybe these families didn't live in the kind of luxury we are all used to, but the love they have and the way in which they care for each other makes them rich. I want to live in community like that some day. This being said, the townships continue to have big problems, drug use and alchololism are very prevalent, and it is hard for children to receive adequate education unless the parents can afford transportation to a school further away and medical attention for the widespread issue of HIV/AIDS and TB is also difficult to get. The area in Philippi where we stayed was named Vuk'uzenzele-and the families created the community themselves 11 years ago-wake up in the morning and do it yourself.

We arrived Friday night and left Sunday afternoon. It was very hard being pulled away from our new family, who we had grown so close to over such a short amount of time. Sunday morning we attended a Xhosa Methodist church service, well, three hours of it at least-we had to leave early. It was all in Xhosa, and about 75% of the service was soulful, spirit lead singing. The xhosa hymns were so loud and powerful, only voices and a leather hand pillow to keep the rhythm. Then the traditional African Sunday dinner of chicken, rice, potatoes and squash, with custard and jello for dessert.

There is so much more i wish to tell you but only so little time and space. Shabeen hopping with our tata, a xhosa birthday celebration, going to a township mall, LOTS of meat in a cardboad box, African beer circles and more. This was one of my favorite weekends so far in Cape Town and I feel that as time progresses here, the things I am learning increase exponentially.

Ithaca

ITHACA
When you set out on your journey to Ithaca,

pray that the road is long,
full of adventure, full of knowledge.

The Lestrygonians and the Cyclops,
the angry Poseidon -- do not fear them:

You will never find such as these on your path,
if your thoughts remain lofty, if a fine

emotion touches your spirit and your body.
The Lestrygonians and the Cyclops,

the fierce Poseidon you will never encounter,
if you do not carry them within your soul,

if your soul does not set them up before you.


Pray that the road is long.
That the summer mornings are many, when,

with such pleasure, with such joy
you will enter ports seen for the first time;

stop at Phoenician markets,
and purchase fine merchandise,

mother-of-pearl and coral, amber and ebony,
and sensual perfumes of all kinds,

as many sensual perfumes as you can;
visit many Egyptian cities,

to learn and learn from scholars.


Always keep Ithaca in your mind.
To arrive there is your ultimate goal.

But do not hurry the voyage at all.
It is better to let it last for many years;

and to anchor at the island when you are old,
rich with all you have gained on the way,

not expecting that Ithaca will offer you riches.


Ithaca has given you the beautiful voyage.
Without her you would have never set out on the road.

She has nothing more to give you.


And if you find her poor, Ithaca has not deceived you.
Wise as you have become, with so much experience,

you must already have understood what Ithaca means.


Constantine P. Cavafy, 1911